Complete with photos of air hostesses and Latvian pirates
In the pit of exam season despair, you’ll look anywhere for revision tips and tricks.
But have you ever thought about looking to the wacky and wonderful world of the Eurovision Song Contest for life advice and inspiration? Probably not, but at Legal Cheek we thought it sounded like a great idea.
In the run-up to this year’s Eurovision Song Contest on Saturday, we have trawled through some of the funniest, scariest and weirdest entries to ever grace our screens, and have found some pretty useful snippets of advice for wannabe solicitors and barristers.
Here, we share our 17 favourite pieces of wisdom — interpreted for law students.
1. A message from Eric Saade, Sweden 2011
Stop, don’t say that it’s impossible, because I know it’s possible
It is possible! You can read Factortame to the end!
2. A message from Donatan & Cleo, Poland 2014
Vodka is better than whisky and gin
Some good advice from Poland: think strategically about your ‘drowning exam sorrows’ substance of choice.
3. A message from Måns Zelmerlöw, Sweden 2015
I can’t undo what has been done
Law students, you need to face up to the fact you’ve skipped almost a year of lectures and still don’t really know what the supremacy of EU law actually is. There’s no point dwelling on your hungover mistakes of the past: accept that you didn’t work as hard as you could’ve done this year, and move on. A good piece of advice from the reigning king of Eurovision.
4. A message from Massiel, Spain 1968
I sing… to the sun that brings us new hope day by day
You’ll have some naff revision days, it happens to the best of us. But keep your chin up, tomorrow is a new day.
5. A message from Rambo Amadeus, Montenegro 2012
I got only one rule, always stay cool like a swimming pool
You’re probably sick of hearing this from your mum (well, maybe not the swimming pool bit), but it really is a good revision tip. Fretting and panicking won’t get you anywhere, so stay as calm as you can.
6. A message from Emmelie de Forest, Denmark 2013
Please tell me why, why do we make it so hard? Look at us now, we only got ourselves to blame
You can complain about your overwhelming workload and stacks of revision notes all you like, but you only have yourself to blame. You knew it was going to be tough when you enrolled on the LLB, so stop complaining and start working.
7. A message from Bucks Fizz, UK 1981
Trust your inner vision, don’t let others change your mind
Dead set on only learning four topics for your land law exam? Go for it. Want to apply for a training contract in a criminal law firm, but all your friends want to do commercial law? Stick to your guns, and don’t give in to peer pressure.
8. A message from Eric Papilaya, Austria 2007
Living in this world can be a little too much, don’t let it get you down, get up and strut
I.e. Go for a walk and clear your head during revision breaks.
9. A message from the Tolmachevy Sisters, Russia 2014
No one’s gone bring me down, bring me down
Don’t let other law students psych you out during this stressful time. And especially don’t listen to the people that say they feel totally prepared for exams and know every single lecture slide off by heart — they’re either bluffing, superhuman or mistaken.
10. A message from Lordi, Finland 2006
Now choose to join us or go straight to hell
Umming and ahhing about whether to join the land law revision breakfast club, or the mooting team? Just go for it, what’s the worst that could happen? You’ve only got one shot at law school, so get involved in whatever you can. Other lines from this Eurovision classic — which saw heavy metal band Lordi scoop the crown for Finland a decade ago — include “my fangs are sharp, and my eyes are red”. Too much Red Bull and not enough sleep? Sounds like a classic law student to us.
11. A message from Dana International, Israel 1998
Silent tears drop from these eyes tonight
Sometimes it’s okay to have a little cry, especially in the days leading up to your land law exam.
12. A message from Brotherhood of Man, UK 1976
Don’t cry, honey, don’t cry
But let’s not spend all day crying. It wastes valuable energy, and — while it might not feel this way right now — you’ll look back in a few months time and realise there really was nothing to cry about. Keep your head high and move on.
13. A message from Gipsy.cz, Czech Republic 2009
If you really wanna understand, just sing it with me, dadada
A good, quirky revision technique: making up songs and rhymes to help remember case names and legal principles might seem silly, but it can work wonders. Acronyms, pictures and flowcharts help too.
14. A message from Scooch, UK 2007
Helsinki onto Prague, don’t matter where we are, yeah yeah yeah
A change of scenery can help you combat mid-revision session boredom. Revising in the library is lame: why not set up camp in a local park, a café, or a friend’s house?
15. A message from Loreen, Sweden 2012
Don’t ever stop doing the things you do
Swedish pop singer and producer Loreen, the queen of Eurovision, has an important message for you lawbies: don’t let revision become your entire life during exams. If you normally go to football practice on a Wednesday, go to football practice on a Wednesday. And if you want to watch Eurovision on Saturday night, watch Eurovision on Saturday night. Little revision breaks will help keep you sane, and will stop you becoming overly stressed out.
16. A message from Verka Serduchka, Ukraine 2007
Dancing is good
Dancing is good for the soul, and for students it can prove a really good stress reliever. If you’re more into running, or singing, or painting, then get running, singing or painting. Other words of wisdom from this classic Eurovision gem include “seven, seven, bye-bye, seven, seven, one, two” and “dancing is good, come on, come on, come on, well done”. Makes about as much sense as the FHR European Ventures decision.
17. A message from Pirates of the Sea, Latvia 2008
There’s treasure in sight
And finally… keep going! The academic year is very nearly over, and exam success is in sight.