These would have made amazing laws
This week, a new petition — calling for the Meningitis B vaccine to be given to all children — overtook the infamous ban Donald Trump from the UK venture as the petition with the most signatures.
But, lying deep in the corner of parliament’s website is a world of rejected petitions, nearly 2,500 of them. And some of them are great.
We count down our 30 favourite petition rejects.
30. Make David Bowie “Heroes” new national anthem
Unfortunately MPs don’t seem to like David Bowie
29. Make an English national anthem and make it “Slam” by Pendulum
28. World-Peace
27. Adjust all MP’s wages to the minimum wage
26. Bring back shirley the canley lollipop lady (Wolf road)
25. Stop the enforcement of formal dress code at work
Would love it if the Magic Circle started donning tracksuits and snapbacks
24. Mark Byrne to London with whatsap boys on his wife’s Bday (she’s going the spa)
23. Jeremy Hunter to resign as health Secretary
22. Stop discrimination against tall people
21. Make referees explain themselves after a football game
Post-game interviews should be a thing
20. Stop Cameron and his party from killing the UK, remove them from power!
This would have made an interest parliamentary debate
19. Thoroughly ignore Donald Trump
Donald Trump should be thoroughly ignored
18. SAY “NO” TO 10,000 TWITTER CHARACTERS!
17. Make the reading of the complete Harry Potter series compulsory by the age of 16
Compulsory Harry Potter for all
16. Make Cadbury Freddo’s 10 pence again
15. Ban Piers Morgan from Twitter
14. Nandos to deliver all orders Nationwide across the United Kingdom
13. Stop naming gales in the UK — it’s silly
12. Let Jade go home early on Christmas Eve
11. Give Sean his day off
10. Ask Nestle to make an all orange Smarties tube
9. Make it illegal for women to wear heels in an exam hall to stop distraction
8. Stop using Wales as a unit of measurement
Wales is not a unit of measurement!
7. Stop people starting petitions for no real reason
6. Send David Cameron to fight the Daesh
5. Make a fangirl school
Round up all fan girls and put them in their own school
4. Invite Donald Trump to the UK so we can laugh at him in person
3. Identify “Ginger” as an ethnicity on all official government documentation
“Align with our red headed brothers and sisters”
2. Reconsider the standing of fursuits as being porn items
Poor fursuits, they mean no harm
1. Make Ann Widdecombe Primeminster with immediate effect
